F.Y.I.

there's nothing I hate more in this world than an insecure female.

 "A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity."

--Robert A. Heinlein 

Where DO I Stand?

I've fallen in ♥ with this song by Ashanti.

 

Just Like Glass...

 

"It's crazy how your best friend can downgrade to a a distant associate so quickly."

It took me sometime but I realized that everyone that may have been a GOOD friend to me wasn't exactly a BEST friend to me...I'm sorry but there is no way that as "best" friends I should have had to deal with someone's jealousy issues and insecurities since high school (and we became friends in 8th grade!) I would be lying if I said that there weren't a lot of good, no GREAT, times with our friendship but there were equally as mean HORRIBLE times. That friendship taught me a lot and for that I'll always cherish it and love it but the end of the friendship that everyone thought would last a lifetime just proves true the statement that not everything last forever.

Damn That Kobe!

lol thats what a lot of people are probably saying right about now but oh well *Kanyeshrugs* it doesn`t matter. Why? because the Lakers have done it again lol. Good job to the Celtics though, this was most def one of my fav. final series. now that b-balls over though we can get to what really matters....FOOTBALL!!! Cuz New Orleans is about to be screaming "Who Dat?!"

Hey Sweets!!

Sorry about being MIA but...life's been N-U-T-S I swear it has lol.
BUT
the semester is over for me so its back to blogging and I do have some things to tell you guys about. Good, bad, and funny lol.
I'll be posting tomorrow sooo....

Cleansing Time

I can honestly say that this has truly been a few of the craziest weeks in my life and I am in no rush to repeat the experience, believe me lol. I learned a lot about some of the different people in my life and I can't lie...my perceptions on a few of them changed: some for the better and some for the worse. But at the end of the day: I know it's all a part of helping me grow into the person I need to be.

Let's see, where to start? I guess with the most surprising part. Someone that I considered a "best" friend, even a "sister", showed me her true colors and how she truly felt about me and even though it hurt a lot at first and still hurts now, I'm glad I know all of this now rather than years down the line ya know? I've learned to put the people in my life in categories and keep them there, for my own sake and for the first time ever, I feel no guilt about doing it.

What I'm about to say now...I don't believe it and neither do my two girls that I told about it but here goes: I've finally gotten the strength to let my ex-boyfriend pull completely out of my life. Even though, it only happened because of an argument we had, I realized that no matter what I did and no matter how hard I tried, it was never going to be good enough for him. I've given him nothing but my love and all that was in me since the age of 15 (and I'm 21 now) and he basically threw it back in my face and said that it meant nothing at all. Well, I told him if that was the case, then I'd just get out of his life since I mean nothing to him...I expected for myself to break down but instead? I felt such a feeling of relief that it took me for a surprise. I can finally move on from him and find the person that God meant for me who WILL appreciate and love me the way I'm meant to be loved.

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

I'm Back Hons!

 and for a while I thought I may be one of those people.

for awhile there, with everything that I had going on, I thought I had lost my passion for writing but thank goodness that wasn't the case. I just needed a break to get myself and recharge my batteries so to speak lol.

I think some people need to learn what the real meaning of being friends is. Not the elementary school meaning of the word, which some people never grow out of but the ADULT meaning of being someone's friend.

I never thought I'd say this but now I realize why my mother made sure that I could stand on my own two feet and on my own and why she taught me to never really need others...it kills me how I give my all to every person that I call or have ever called a "friend" and in the end, I still feel alone.

Yes, I love to go out and have fun but that's not all of the time. I expect for REAL friends to understand when I'm tired and just wanna relax and NOT be given grief over it. I'm all for a few jokes here and there but there comes a point when it's considered going too far and some people don't understand that.


People that claim to be "best friends" didn't seem to catch on that after awhile the jokes weren't funny anymore but the minute my little sister saw my face she knew something was wrong....I told her what happened and even SHE couldn't get why they were acting like that...what does that say?

It's funny because there have been sooo many times when I haven't wanted to go out or even be bothered with them but I did it anyway. Wanna know why? because I was trying to be a good friend and this is what I get in return?

If that's the case, then I'd rather not have anymore close friends and just keep everyone as acquaintances and associates because obviously having friends hurts.

Quote of the Day

"If you're shy, get the hell over it:
You're slamming the door in your own face."

 
--Kimora Lee Simmons

Cutest Wedding Entrance!

I swear I am still, to this day, in ♥ with this video!
I'd love to do something like this or goofy for my wedding someday
.............
until then I'll just live vicariously through Jill and Kevin.

H*e Shit PSA

Being a hoe has never BEEN, is NOT and will never BE something to be proud of!

 

I swear fo' Jesus I've heard more than my share of h*e shit in the first few months of 2010 than I heard in all of 2009 and 2008 put together and that disturbs every little bone in my 5'0 130 lbs body *smdh*.

I thought most of these celebs would've learned to be more...select in who they did they dirt with after Superhead oh I'm sorry, I mean Karrine Steffans exposed their asses in her 1st two books but obviously not because who do we have now? Tiger Woods 3-pages of mistresses and Kat Stacks.

I am in no way saying hoeing is a good thing but dayum! at least Superhead* got paid for her hoe ways! She was able to at least take care of herself and her child but this basic bisch Kat Stacks? According to her blog, which I refuse to link!, she's done the down and dirty with Bow Wow(who no one has taken seriously since umm lemme think...ever!), Aaron Carter aka the little brother of Nick Carter(Backstreet Boys), Jae Millz and Lil Twist from Young Money, and Lil Za(?). lol no seriously wth is Lil Za? 

**note to self* time to learn these new artists**

Now I feel the need to say this: 
hoes need to be taken out back and put out of everyone's misery!
*shrugs*
Sorry if you don't like it, oh well that's me
#getthefuckoverit

I'm sure most of us have that one friend/associate that is a hoe. I mean we may try to clean it up or make it sound better than it is but screw that. If she's sleeping with married men, brothers, friends, cousins, godbrothers, anything along those lines...she's a hoe! I'm sorry but if you've slept with 2 or more family members or friends in the same group...you need to stitch your va-jay-jay(c) ->B.Scott<- up and find another purpose for your life because guess what dear?...you've just become a flipper.

If that was you're life's dream, then congratulations: you've succeeded.

It amazes me how some females can say with a straight face and a good heart that they're just doing what other females are doing. *side-eye* uh huh and if all of those other females were lining up to jump off the empire state building would you be right there with em?....if you have to hesitate and actually think about that, then do us both a favor and #killyourself right now. Thank you.

I understand that some people have had a hard childhood. No father, no mother, they were abused, etc etc but at some point in time we all have to decide what we want our lives to become. It's called personal responsibility: learn it, love it and live it 'kay? If you're gonna do h*e shit at least be smart enough to wear a gauddamn condom!!

*looks around and whispers*
I don't know if y'all have heard or not but there's this disease going around that kills
*screams*
it's called AIDS/HIV!!!

My Friends Are Hilarious

and it never fails that they give me one good laugh everyday! We have the type of friendship where we can all talk about each other all the time and no feelings get hurt in the end.

Sooo basically I was on facebook a little while ago and saw this as one of my friends status:

"what weighs 45 lbs wet and is hard as hell to see at night...I'll give you a hint: On Nutty Cuh!"

lmfao!! Basically she's talking about our other friend who is....very dark-skinned *I guess thats the nicest way to put it*

Even though it's damn near midnight, I am in here laughing my ass off at these fools. I just can't wait till he retaliates because I know he will and I KNOW it's gonna be good.

It's Been Awhile

since I've really wrote in my blog so I just thought I'd give you guys a quick update of what's been going on in my crazy world lol. 1)I'm in the process of trying to transfer to a 4-year university b/c I'm ready to get back into one. I've done the community college and no disrespect to anyone else but...it's not the place for me. It's not challenging me in any type of way and honestly I feel as if I'm back in high school. 2) Remember how great things were going between me and "Mr. Right"? Yeah well, things have been put on pause between us because we haven't really been in touch with each other like we used to be. 3) Two of my ex's have decided that they want to pop back into my life and try to throw me into a loop and they almost succeeded until I remembered why all of 3 of them BECAME ex's in the 1st place. 4) I started my job search...again so wish me luck on that please! 5) I'm enjoying being SINGLE!! I mean I have guys that I'm talking to and that I'm hanging with but at the end of the day, the only person I have to consider and worry about is me,myself and I and that is SUCH a refreshing feeling....well I guess that's about it for now lol.

Telephone {Official Video}

The genius that is Lady Gaga and Beyonce finally premiered last night and if anyone was in doubt before about Lady Gaga being a talent to be reckoned with, THIS showed them wrong. I just love everything "Bad bad Gaga" and "Honey Bey" are doing with this vid! Oh and how hawt are the cans as rollers in Gaga's hair?

"Trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if its broke but you can still see the crack in that muthafucka's reflection"
--Lady Gaga & Honey Bey

Can Open Relationships Save Us?

Along with Angelina Jolie/Brad Pitt and Will and Jada Pinkett-Smith, Mo'Nique is the most recent celeb to admit that she and her husband have an "open marriage".

Which brings about my question: 

do open relationships make it easier for a couple to stay together?
 
In her interview Mo said that she would have no problem with her husband stepping outside of their marriage, even if it had been 20 times because that's not a deal breaker. And that she is very secure and comfortable in her marriage and her husband.

In an interview a few years ago, Will Smith was quoted as having said "If it came down to it, then one would say to the other: Look, I need to have sex with somebody. Now, I'm not going to do it if you're uncomfortable with it." "In our marriage vows, we didn't say forsaking all others. We said you will never hear I did something afterwards."

I think we all read the interview with Angelina Jolie where she said that she doubts fidelity is absolutely necessary in order for a relationship to work and that neither her or Brad ever claimed that living together meant they were chained together. She also went on to say that they never restrict each other.


Now everyone else may be thinking that having an open relationship is wrong and not meant to happen because marriage is supposed to tie 2 people to each other and each other only BUT we all can't deny one thing: 

ALL of these couples are EXTREMELY happy with each other.

Personally, I see no reason why an open relationship would not be able to work out if both people in the relationship set down rules in the beginning and made sure that they were always followed.

I mean let's be honest, there is always going to be a chance that the person you're involved with is going to want to step out on you and even though they may resist at first, eventually...they may give in to that temptation. Wouldn't it be better if they told you about it and once you two set up ground rules, it happened and then was over?

If you still think no, can I ask a question:
How many marriages end because one partner was unfaithful and the other didn't find out until it was too late?

...

exactly.

Now I am in NO way saying that people in relationships should just start sleeping with other people just for the hell of it. What I am saying is that instead of criticizing and talking down about other people's decisions and choices maybe we should have an open mind.

I think the best blog I've read that talks about open relationships is from Jenn over at PrincessProse. Here's her blog about it: open relationships

....Beautiful Tribute

and one of the very RARE ones that, in my opinion, do any justice for the King of Pop.

RIP Michael Jackson
"Lies run sprints, but the truth runs marathons."

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Happy 100th

Wow I can't believe I've already reached my 100th post....

When I started my blog, the main reason for it was to have a haven that I could use for my crazy and hectic mind. Some place that I could say what I wanted, how I wanted and not have to worry about censoring myself.

All 100 posts I've written so far have been true to who I am and yep! *nods head* the rest of them will be just the same.

To Be Grateful...

"When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive-

to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love."
--Marcus Aurelius

Is Kindness A Weakness?

"Respect is more important than friendship"
 

Lately, I've really started to question some of the people that I consider "friends" and as my girl pointed out to me a few days ago, I do too much for EVERYONE around me and maybe that needs to stop for them to appreciate it more. I've always been a naturally kind person. I will always go that extra mile and sometimes go out of my way to do things for people that I consider "friends" and I've started to notice that it's not always returned...not in the slightest way.

I give a lot of myself because growing up as a child, that was what I saw my grandmother do and she is THE kindest person anyone will ever meet in this world.

Now  though?

I'm done with that.

I have friends who just take and take from me and then seem to get mad when I want to be left alone for a little while. I enjoy spending time with my friends and yeah sure I'll entertain you guys when you're bored because you do it for me BUT there does come a point when I want to be A-L-O-N-E okay? I mean my mother raised me to be able to entertain and take care of myself for hours at a time. Also last time, I checked it was NOT my responsibility to be anyone's source of entertainment.

Another thing, there have been plenty of times that I've gone BROKE buying food or other things for these so-called "friends" because, in my opinion, that's what friends do for one another. Only to turn around later and when it's time to return the favor, all of a sudden...it can't be done.

"Don't take my kindness for weakness"

A lot of things are about to change with the way I let my "friendships" continue on and anyone who doesn't like it is more than welcome to walk out of the 'Exit' door because my mother & grandmother raised me to be kind, not weak which is what I feel like they think I am and that is SOOO far from the truth.

Giving Up Men

I am giving up men for the next 40 days! Yeah, that's what I'm giving up for the next 40 days, even though I'm not Catholic.

I decided that since I'm tired of dealing with the same old bullshit that seems to come attached to almost every guy in New Orleans, I'll just take a break from them in general.

Doesn't sound that difficult right?
Yeah, well I know it's gonna be hard because I love my N.O. guys but sometimes I really feel like they are NOT the ones for me...like we're just entirely DIFFERENT people ya know?

So...this is my mission: not to get any closer or start a new relationship with any guy in the city until Lent is over.

I Sooo Hate......

extreme overly sensitive niggas and females!
That shit irks every bone in my body to the 100th degree 

and more importantly, it just screams "B.I.T.C.H." to me.

Let me explain.

I'm the type of female that believes there is a FINE line between being sensitive and just being a Bitch. Nowadays, it seems as though everybody is going through their time of the month every day of the year and I'm sick of it. I'ma need all the people this applies to, to take that goddamn tampon out and throw that muhfucka away, 'kay?

I mean damn! maybe it's just the fact that I come from a cut-throat ass family that talks such shit about each other constantly, in a good AND bad way, that I have tougher skin than most people but fuck!! If that's the case, get me a ticket and book me a flight on the next plane outta here cause this shit ain't for me.

I know I sound a lil on the mean side right now but fuck it, that's just the type of person I am. I've NEVER been one of these sensitive females, except for a few rare times and those were in understandable circumstances. I know most people have heard this before "don't throw shit out if you can't handle it being thrown back at you."

Extinction of Loyalty

 

Webster gives the following definition for loyalty:

1) the state or quality of being loyal;faithfulness to commitments or obligations.

2) faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader, cause, etc. 

3)an example or instance of faithfulness, adherence or the likeness.

My definition of loyalty:

1)something that you give only a few people in this world 

2)no matter what happens you have each others back. 

3)most importantly: being able to say, with confidence, that you trust that person 100%.

Over the years, I've learned a very important lesson: 

"All those I'm loyal to aren't always loyal to me."

More and more now a days, loyalty is becoming only a memory. Females dating close friends ex-boyfriends or guys that their girl is involved with. Guys going behind their boys back and messing with their girl. Family members back-stabbing each other. Treating people who've always had your back as if they were a stranger or your enemy.

I mean really ladies, how can you date the ex boyfriend of someone that you call your "sister"? How can you go behind your girls back and talk to a dude that you KNOW she's talking to and have no problem with it? Guys are just as guilty as females of doing that to someone they call their "brother". Family members turning their back on each other or not being there for one another when it's necessary is...shocking to me because I come from a family that, no matter WHAT, when it comes to the blood in our veins? It's always going to be us against the world if something is going on.

Where's the loyalty?

I understand what some people mean when they say "I came in this world alone and that's the way I'm gonna leave it." because even though that is true, you can't go through life alone. You're going to need someone to have your back at one point in time, trust me.

"The best things in life are never rationed. 
Friendship, loyalty, love do not require coupons."
--George Hewitt

Diamonds and Dimes

 

 picture courtesy of 123RF.com Photographer::Sebastian Duda

Dimes and Diamonds
The Dime walks by shining real nice
spinning 5 times, looking kinda tight
but he spent her last week
so she's another mans today
sitting up crunching on a bag of Frito-Lays .
The Diamond is priceless
and more than just a jewel
she's admired by all
the old, the young, and the cruel
she's slim in the waist and fat in tha back
she gets the man's attention before she can even say snap.
The Dime is indulged
she wonders what she does not have.
the Diamond has something that she surely does lack
is it the knowledge on her shoulders
and the beauty of her looks?
is it the way she smiles
that gets tha boys hook?
The Diamond is intrigued
she knows she is top of line
she knows any guy she can win over will treat her far better than a dime
so she wonders what she has that the dime lacks
is it the clothes she doesn't wear
has to be matter of fact
the Dime isn't good enough
the Diamond already knows
the Dime is spent
while she is held on to with divulge
The Dime is sad
she wants to be the best
but how can she compete with someone who sleeps but never gets rest
the Diamond is steadily at rest
she barely has time for play
the Dime wishes she could stop working at burger joints and speedway
she sick of laying on her back
moaning and making sounds
she's tired of getting paid by these men
just so she can lay down
The Diamond has the money to splurge
she went to college and earned her degree
she's sporting the latest Jay's
and the fashion's best of Nike's
she carries herself well
she moves before her feel
she wipes the dust off her shoulders
and stay on shopping sprees
The reality is that
any woman can be a diamond
one that will never get old
never fade
and never be looked over
A Diamond shines and is always precise
always knows what she wants in life
a Dime is basically something a woman should not want to be
though they shine at the making
it's something that will fade after years of use and rough handling
while a dime can be traded, used, and bargained for
the Diamond will still have the legacy and last forever.

Mr. Right?...pt. IV

I'm not to sure how appropriate the title is anymore but that's how I started it and that's what it'll stay...for now at least.

*sigh* honestly I don't know what's going on with him and I for the past 2 weeks. I mean, not talking to him for 2 days didn't really upset me because we both are busy with school and family and for him work too so just texting each other for 15 minutes was all I needed but....that's stopped now. Birthday plans...yeah just didn't happen. Actually my entire birthday just went by ignored by him-->still haven't admitted how much that hurt me<--.

I don't know...maybe I'm expecting too much from him too early but is it really a lot to ask that he remember my birthday?

Being 100% honest with myself....I just miss having him around. He's one of the few guys that I can really be myself around...and the fact that he can hold a conversation....*sigh* who knows, maybe he's been busy or has his own things going on. I'm not about to give up hope on him or just write him off just yet...but I'm gonna have to figure something out.

B-day Recap

As you guys know, I made 21 this past Friday and of course my girls and I partied all weekend!!!

Friday and Saturday were our nights for intoxication and yeah....I regretted it the next morning b/c of the hangover from hell.

I have to admit though, as much as I enjoyed Friday and Saturday, Sunday made my weekend WONDERFUL!!!

The Saints are going to Miami for the Superbowl!!!

**as soon as we find the camera lol, I'll put up a few pics**

Disney At It's Finest...

and when I say at it's finest, I mean that literally lol.

I think all girls were in love with at least 1 or 2 different Disney characters when we were younger because I know I was-->Simba (don't judge me lol) and Hercules (did you SEE those muscles and smile?!)<--. Well I was browsing over at Taste Of A Poison Paradise and came across these wonderful pictures that make you think of Disney in a different light.

everyone's favorite frog: Prince Naveen

Our wonderful prince on a flying carpet: Aladdin

the other man who wanted Pocahontas' heart: Kocoum

and last but not least: the Greek God Hercules.

 

You can see the whole gallery over at David Kawena!!

Song of The Day

his one is a throwback song in honor of our wonderful r&b princess Aaliyah who's 31st birthday would have been a few days ago.

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

This is "No one knows how to love me quite the way you do"
**yeah I know stupid long title lol but the song is hot**
It's off of her first cd.

Mr. Right?...pt. III

This guy may actually be the one that I've been looking for and could never seem to find....I mean he actually seems to get me, as I am, and now what he thinks I am ya know? Things have been going really well between the 2 of us. I mean if we don't talk everyday, we'll at least text each other and keep in touch and if we don't...we can call/text a few days later and it feels as if no time had passed at all. With him working and both of us going to school, there really isn't a lot of time left for us to talk but we both seem to make the time which is good because I always seem to get off the phone with him, peaceful and smiling and I love that feeling....I needed him a few days ago to talk to about some things that were bothering me and even though he had to get up early the next day for work, he stayed up and talked to me until I felt better. Now THAT is what someone who really cares for you will do and I"m learning that more and more everyday thanks to him.

Umm...I think that's it for now lol. 

Ohhh! almost forgot: he's been trying his hardest to see me for my bday Friday and so Friday, we're going to spend time together and he said he's gonna try and find something special for us to do. *squeals* I"m too excited to see what happens lol.